Love springs from a camp for adults with developmental disabilities

From the San Francisco Chronicle's On the couch column:

It's been years since Kim Bazile, now 45, first spotted Noah Kessler, now 41. Neither remembers exactly how many years ago this was - somewhere around 20 - but they know they were attending a summer camp in Napa for adults with developmental disabilities. "I let things happen naturally," says Noah, who at that point had another girlfriend. That one, he reports, was "a lot of headache." So when it came to Kim, he "didn't put any pressure on her." (The two are pictured.)

But Kim had a plan of her own. After the charming Noah hit her radar, Kim began secretly following him around. At one point he went missing. Having last seen him in the swimming pool, she had a gut feeling something was wrong. At the pool, according to their story, Kim found Noah stuck in the water.

"I got him out," says Kim. "He was real cold, and I told him to squeeze my hand if he could hear me." From that moment on, they had a connection. "Then I told the other girls to leave him alone," Kim admits, smiling. Noah laughs. "I was hoping for this with Kim, but I wasn't going to count on it."

Noah, then living in Santa Rosa with his mother, started a routine of daily calls that spanned two years. "My mother moved me to San Francisco to be closer to Kim," says Noah, "because the phone bills were so high."

Kim, who still lives with her mother in Bayview-Hunters Point, was thrilled. Noah's mother eventually died; he now lives with his brother within walking distance of Kim, but the two spend every night together. In 2004, Noah asked Kim to marry him. Their ceremony took place at the Arc of San Francisco, a resource center in downtown San Francisco for adults with developmental disabilities. (Both are legally blind and have cognitive impairment; Noah has cerebral palsy.) Kim spends weekdays at the Arc; Noah joins her there on Wednesdays for art classes. On other days, he attends another facility.

This best part of the wedding? "My dress," says Kim, looking admiringly over wedding photos, "and when I put the ring on you and you put the ring on me." Noah, who is Jewish, enjoyed breaking the "bottle." "Kim wants someone to be there," says Noah, "and that's me. I found that, too."

The two go to movies - though Noah won't go to scary ones, Kim's favorites. And they clearly appreciate each other. Noah, Kim says, is kind, nice and makes her laugh. Kim, Noah reports, has helped him through difficult times, such as when his mother died. "The times no one wants to talk about," he explains. "And," he adds, "Kim loves to dance. If there is music, you'll see Kim dancing, you will." Then Noah, slow and unsteady on his feet, accompanies his wife to the art room.

Secrets to their long relationship?

Noah: "We take turns talking. And we never go to bed mad."

Kim: "Compromise. Sometimes I watch stuff that I like on TV and sometimes I let him watch WWF 'Smackdown,' even though I don't like it."